Thanks for the invite

First post, pleasure to join you all, I've been catching up with the readings and am glad to be able to take part in this. Commenting on what Raine said, I feel like I can relate to Job and am trying to learn to trust God through the hard times. I have definitely had some struggles in the past few months, nothing compared to Job but nonetheless feeling like God took something away from me that was/is so important to me. (I have been suffering from a severely herniated disc in my back that has left me hobbling around for the past 3 months or so and hopefully will soon be operated on). To not be able to even kick a soccer ball or jump a few inches off the ground, or even lift my leg very well has been a frustrating experience and so many times I have cried out to God to take away the pain and felt like I am speaking to a deaf ear. I continue to move forward and keep walking through the pain (literally and metaphorically) but it is definitely a struggle. I think about how many things I usually use as a crutch: money, power, nationality, health, education, etc. I realize that often it is so easy to worship/trust God with your mouth but your actions say something different and your heart knows differently. I liked Job 5:18 that says "For he wounds, but he also binds up: he injures, but his hands also heal." I think I am starting to learn to just give it all up to God and trust that he knows what he is doing, that his timing is better than mine and his plan superior to mine. This is hard to do, I feel like I need to have more power in my life, or at least feel like I have it, but this experience has been a humbling one, just one little insignificant disc in my back is out of place and all my power, speed, athleticism, everything is gone and I am rendered weak. It has really just shown me the fragility of my strength and I was drawn to what John the Baptist said in John 3 "You yourselves can testify that I said, 'I am not the Christ but am sent ahead of him.' The bride belongs to the bridegroom. The friend who attends the bridegroom waits and listens for him, and is full of joy when he hears the bridegrooms voice. That joy is mine, and it is now complete. He must become greater, I must become less." How true that is, its a painful lesson of being broken, one that is a long and sometimes painful journey, one I still haven't learned, but am fighting through. I just want to be the hero of the story, but am learning to recognize that that can never be my role, but in that there is freedom to be used by God.